Shreya Bhat

Shreya Bhat

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Official party member. Survivor of standups, reply-alls, and appraisal season.

🪪 CJP-2026-70904 📋 20 posts 📅 Joined Mar 2026

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Complaints & victories

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Manager: "Don't bring me problems, bring solutions." Me: *brings resignation letter draft*

2 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Standup question: "Any blockers?" Me: "Existential dread." Awkward silence achieved.

2 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Automated my daily status update with ChatGPT. Manager praised my "detailed reports."

2 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Completed all Jira tickets. Got assigned double next sprint. Capitalism works.

2 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Set Slack to DND forever. Peace restored. Should have done this in 2019.

2 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

My Teams status green. My will to work: red.

3 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Manager booked "brainstorm." No storm, only drizzle of vague ideas.

3 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Manager scheduled a "quick sync" that lasted 90 minutes. Nobody synced. Everyone suffered.

3 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Team lunch bill split equally. I ordered salad. Capitalism favors the hungry.

3 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Installed ad blocker for sanity. Still can't block meetings. Feature request pending.

3 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Used "as discussed" in email with zero prior discussion. Corporate gaslighting 101.

3 months ago View

Software Engineer (Glorified Googler)

Completed compliance training. Still non-compliant with basic human rest.

3 months ago View